• 25 MAY 18
    • 0
    Accepting the Unacceptable

    Accepting the Unacceptable

    There are times in life when we are required to accept the unacceptable.

    We tend to battle what we view as unacceptable with a sense of resistance. It comes from the ongoing conflict of what we desire and what is the reality. We often resist what is happening and believe that there is no solution. We believe that there are no possibilities out of our situation. Our perceptions are often closed to all else that may be more positive.

    Understandably, accepting the reality can be very painful and the pain is enhanced by our own reluctance to let go of wanting to right the wrong. There are some wrongs that may never be righted. Accepting doesn’t necessarily mean that we must accept the wrong—the injustice, rather to acknowledge it and to see the avenues out of the pain.

    Accepting allows what is happening to happen. While we may feel as though we are eternally stuck in a specific outcome, no outcome is ever the finale. Life is a journey; evolving and changing all the time. This outcome you find yourself faced with today is only the outcome for the present. It has the potential to change into something else, far more positive if we allow our mind see to opportunity. We cannot give up – We need to accept that this is what it is for the present, yet there is potential for our life to evolve. It does take enormous courage to remain hopeful while accepting a present situation that does not fit into what we had hoped for. This is especially true for those who tend to invest all their emotional resources into one single thing, whether it is family relationships, a career, an idea, etc. to the exclusion of everything else in our lives. To invest all our emotional resources into one thing puts us at risk of finding ourselves with nothing when that thing is gone.

    It is truly a dangerous illusion that we have nothing apart from this one thing in which we have placed so much importance. We have simply failed to look and to see what else there is out there since we have been wearing blinders. We are so obsessed with the hurt that we feel.

    We may be caught in a refusal to let things be – including all that is unacceptable. As difficult as it may be, forgiveness has the power to liberate us. Most of all, we must learn to forgive ourselves. By forgiving, it moves us from a place of being stuck in our negative judgments to a different place where we can better gain a greater understanding of what has happened. That greater understanding has the power to heal us and free us from the impression of being trapped in our own pain.

    Sometimes, forgiving ourselves is far more difficult than forgiving others. We need to accept that what happened has happened. We should focus on how much we have grown by recognizing that we have real choices. Forgiveness is one step towards being able to accept what we view as unacceptable.

    The idea of accepting the unacceptable may fill us with worry, anxiety and fear. Once we let go of resisting than we can have a better sense of peace of mind. With acceptance, once too painful to bear, we are seeing not only the reality, but also what is also possible.

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