Advice - Page 8 of 11 - BCS Counseling.

Valentine’s Day, love is the topic of the moment.

When we think about love, we generally think in terms of who loves us and whom we love, both of which refer to others. What if Valentine’s Day were really about falling in love with ourselves? Cherishing ourselves?

No matter what relationship you are in, if you don’t know how to appreciate yourself then you don’t know what would make you happy and whole. Some women feel if they don’t have a date, someone to buy them roses or chocolate that they are not worth it.

Last year I was alone for Valentine’s Day and it was an eye opening experience. I realized that loving myself was a difficult lesson to learn. I started to write in my journal. If I met the perfect man, what would I want from him on this day? I initially didn’t know what I would give myself. I continued to struggle and my thoughts started to flow. I decided I would pamper myself with a spa day an get a massage, manicure, pedicure and perhaps even go see that movie I have been wanting to see for some time. So that is what I did. It was the best Valentine’s Day ever.

Let loving yourself remain constant in your life. Use today to implement that and start the path of self love. Even if you have a partner, make just as much time for yourself as you are willing to make for your significant other. Break out your journal, some candles and let yourself relax and write. Take a bubble bath, treat yourself to a home spa day, indulge in that massage you have wanted, or eat in that restaurant that you have been eyeing for weeks….

You deserve it and you deserve to be loved!

Anxiety will vary from person to person, you may experience nervousness, restlessness, feel tense or a sense of panic or impending doom.

Anxiety can cause physical symptoms such as a fast heartbeat or sweating. It is a normal human response to be anxious in certain situations, but you may have an anxiety disorder if you feel anxious all or most of the time.

Some symptoms of anxiety include:

difficulty focusing or thinking clearly
insomnia
rapid heart rate, breathing, or hyperventilation
increased or heavy sweating
digestive or gastrointestinal problems, such as gas, constipation, or diarrhea
a strong desire to avoid the things that trigger your anxiety
obsessions about certain ideas
anxiety surrounding a particular life event or experience that has occurred in the past

Get help early. Anxiety, like many other mental health conditions, can be harder to treat if you wait. Speak to a professional, your Doctor or a Licensed Therapist.

Self-care is a crucial part of looking after yourself, as well as those around you.

Practicing self-care can produce positive feelings, which boosts motivation and self-esteem leaving you with increased energy to support yourself as well as your loved ones. Engaging in a self-care routine has been proven to reduce anxiety, stress and depression, improve concentration, minimize frustration and anger, increase happiness, improve energy, and more.

Self-care means something different to each of us, but it doesn’t need to be complicated or overly time consuming. We asked our therapists to share their own self-care routines, maybe some of these might work for you:

Victoria
Cup of Tea at night. Glass of wine with my husband while we watch a fun show. Cooking for fun.

Ana
Cooking and creating joy with food is one of my favorite forms of self care.

Auressa
Winding down in the evenings by taking a shower with lavender & vanilla body wash and lotion, doing bed yoga, drinking “well-rested” tea and doing my night time meditation. I also try to do a bentonite clay mask every week to take a mindful pause and care for my skin.

Dahley
Getting into bed by 10pm. No electronics 1 hour before bed. Drink water. Natural light. Workout 4 days a week.

Ariana
I enjoy being mindful of my phone usage, especially in the morning. I like to stretch & release any stagnant energy or emotions trapped within my body. I love finding new songs & listening to old ones that i enjoyed most. I enjoy meditation & travel. Travel resonates most because i truly believe in working to live, not living to work, especially in the time of working from home which has beautiful perks but can exacerbate feelings of stagnancy.

Heather
I keep a daily bullet journal. It is great for me because it serves two purposes. First, as I am not even a little artistic, my friend creates the monthly outline for me. This means that she and I have a standing monthly date so we know that we are going to spend time together which is wonderful self-care for me. Second, it means that I get daily self-care as I take 5-10 minutes to reflect on my day and record the things I for which I am grateful.

Rachel
I enjoy getting into bed early and reading a book. I also enjoy coloring and painting, watching tv shows and movies, and getting my nails done.

Gabrielle
I often use 4-7-8 breathing. Inhaling for a mental count of 4 seconds, holding the breath for 7 seconds, and exhaling for 8 seconds. This breathing technique really activates the parasympathetic response and helps reset after encountering a stressor or feeling overwhelmed. I will usually do a set of 10-20 breaths. It really works.

Amy
I rely on humor as much as possible– I especially enjoy taking a few minutes to laugh at funny memes about therapy & therapists.

Judy
A Large Latte! Every evening 1-2 Seinfeld episodes. Fill up pitcher of water with blend of nutritive teas including green tea for caffeine, grounded flax seeds, chia seeds, almond milk and cinnamon, drink throughout the day. Go out with friends once a week for fun

Paul
When times are normal, and covid numbers aren’t as high as they currently, I go for bi-weekly manicure appointments and I go with my mother so it’s also quality time with mom. I also enjoy reading and having virtual visits with friends and family, Prayer is also a big part of my daily life.

Azadeh
Walks, knitting 🧶 , meditation 🧘🏻‍♀️, reading 📚

Zoe
Daily exercise, warm tea in the morning, journaling, reaching out to friends, nourishing food, cooking. No screens before bed.

Billie
it is so important for me that I take quiet time and time to move my body. I do at least 20 minutes of yoga, 4 times a week, I have tea before bed every work-night, and I protect my Sundays for rest and laziness, or for whatever I say I want to do.

Gabriella
Salsa dancing classes 1x/week, exercise 3x/week, music during my daily commute, nail salon visit 1x/month.

Cynthia
Daily prayer. Getting out of the house. Stretching. Getting enough sleep. Reading something interesting or enjoyable.

Darlene
Having a mental health day to relax, taking a personal care and self pampering time for yourself. Facial, manicure, pedicure, sauna, these things can be done in the comfort of your own home. Relax with a nice cup of tea or wine and most importantly prayer for our family, loved ones, friends and ourselves.

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Empowerment therapy encourages people to gain the skills and knowledge that will allow them to overcome obstacles in life or a work environment and ultimately, help them develop within themselves or in the society.

Women’s empowerment is a type of therapy that focuses on a women’s sense of self-worth, their ability to determine their own choices, and their right to influence social change for themselves and others. It is a character-building experience in which therapists encourage clients to accept responsibility for their actions.

Our therapists believe that how clients view themselves, and how others treat them, are influenced by their social environment. They honor each woman’s unique experience based on the intersection of her diverse identity.

Personal Empowerment therapy is a process which enables individuals to gain power, authority and influence over themselves, their life or society.

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The most common symptoms include mental block, lack of motivation, irritability, stress eating or loss of appetite and insomnia. Mental exhaustion can affect you for both short-term or long-term. If left unchecked, it can lead to all sorts of serious health problems, including anxiety and burnout.

You get irritated easily. You don’t know why, but almost everything can irritate you. Unfortunately, this can mean you take your frustrations out on those closest to you – those who probably don’t deserve it.

You find it hard to get motivated. You struggle to find the motivation you need for your daily life. This can result in you having a hard time with school, the workplace or even in your own home.

Heightened anxiety. As a result of your mental exhaustion, you probably feel more anxiety or stress, you probably get worried unnecessarily.

Sleep deprived. The overwhelming feeling of exhaustion makes it harder for you to calm your thoughts and fall asleep, which only compounds the fatigue that you are already experiencing.

You are constantly physically tired. When you’re suffering from fatigue, it doesn’t matter how much you sleep, you will still be tired when you get up. It seems never ending.

Mental Fatigue is a treatable condition. The best way to treat it is to eliminate the stressor or the stressful event, if you find you are unable to eliminate the stressor, take advantage of resources available to cope. Talk with a mental health specialist about ways to manage stress and anxiety.

Contact us now if you’d like to talk to an experienced professional – get the help you need.

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We all go through periods of low energy or feeling tired, multiple days of feeling overly tired is not uncommon, but most people can tell when their fatigue feels like something more serious. If that’s the case, or your fatigue gets worse or lasts longer than a week or two, it’s time to get some help.

Psychological causes of tiredness are much more common than physical causes:

Stress
The strains of daily life can feel like they are wearing you out, remember that even positive events, such as moving house or getting married, can cause exhausting stress.

Emotional shock
A bereavement, redundancy or a relationship break-up can make you feel tired and exhausted. Getting professional help to make this grief or shock can help you understand and manage your mental responses.

Depression
If you feel continued sadness and you wake up tired, you may have depression. Sadness is an expected human feeling, but if the sadness extends past 2 to 3 weeks, they it maybe be something more serious. Keep a diary, monitor your feelings. And get help if your sadness persists.

Anxiety
Anxiety can be exhausting! and a perfectly normal human emotion. But if you have regular, excessive feelings of anxiety, you may have Generalised Anxiety Disorder. GAD characterized chronic, exaggerated worry and tension that is more severe than the normal anxiety most people experience. As well as feeling worried and irritable, people with GAD often feel tired.

If you think your tiredness may be a result of one of the above, and you’d like to talk to a professional, contact us now – we will match you with the right therapist for you.

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An article by : Nicoletta Pallotta

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Social isolation and working from home, aimed to stop the spread of the coronavirus may be making domestic violence more frequent, more severe and more dangerous. Are you or someone you love being abused? 1 out of every 3 women are in an abusive relationship and this issue becoming even more common during COVID-19, while we are stressed and forced to spend large amounts of time at home together.

Below are 10 common indicators of abuse:

Stalking: questioning your every move while telling you that they love you and are being protective
Texting or calling you constantly; insisting they are concerned about you and want to make sure that you are safe
Controlling your finances: forcing you to account in detail for every dollar that you spend
Criticizing you for every little thing you do
Humiliating you in front of your family and friends
Angering easily, particularly if he or she is drinking
Forcing you to have sex against your will
Hitting or punching you
Jealously of friendships or any other relationships you have
Isolating you from family and friends

If you can say yes to even one of these, you are in an abusive relationship.

During a calm stage, it’s easy to remain in the relationship thinking that it won’t happen again, but it doesn’t help to ignore the problem or live in hope that the abuser will change. It’s very important to be prepared and have a safety, back-up plan in case the violence erupts again.

Be prepared in case you need to call a shelter

It’s not accepting defeat to be ready. Find out about legal options or other resources available to you before you have to use them. You should know exactly where to go and how to get there, even if a situation arises the middle of the night.

Prepare an emergency bag, for a quick exit

Keep cash, a checkbook, your savings account details, identification, a medical insurance card and your address book in a safe place where the abuser can’t find it. The last thing you want to be worried about at a time like this is money!

Leave the situation

If it happens, be ready to go. If you have children, take them with you. If you are in immediate danger call 911.

Build the perfect Self-Care day from these activities

PICK A FEW AND RECHARGE, OR DO THEM ALL AND HAVE THE BEST DAY EVER.

Exercise. It’s about moving, not about pushing yourself past your limits. Self-care when exercise makes you feel good about yourself, not when you’re focused on burning calories.

Meditate. Meditation is the perfect way to focus inward and acknowledge all of the thoughts and feelings you’ve been neglecting.

Create. Paint, draw, origami, knitting, macrame… Wherever your creativity is, you can fall into a creative trance and relax your mind.

Get outside. Even if its just our own backyard, the outdoors can really impact your mood.

Sleep. The big one. Try settling into bed a little early and get some quality rest. It’s that simple.

Eat healthy. Whether meal prepping for your week, making a nutritious dinner, or cooking up some Sunday breakfast, it’s worth the time.

Read a book / listen to a Podcast. An escape from the ‘real world’, of your choosing.

Take a bath instead of a shower. It’s simple, you can relax in a hot bath.

Meet a fried for a tea. Doesn’t have to be tea, but surround yourself with all of the positive relationships in your life

Spend time with a pet. Everyone knows the unconditional love a pet can give. If you don’t have one, head to the park or local rescue…

Do something for someone else. These acts can get you out of your own head and make someone’s day a little better.

Turn off your phone for 30 minutes. Unplugging can give you a chance to reconnect with the things that really matter to you. Self-care doesn’t get much better than that.

What is Generalized Anxiety disorder?

Generalized Anxiety disorder (GAD) is where Anxiety is present constantly, and is there is no relief.

It interferes with daily function and makes it difficult to get a good night sleep. Anxiety can also manifest through physical symptoms such as: headaches, nausea, diarrhea, increase heart rate, hyperventilating and sweaty palms. Anxiety can be so debilitating that it can interfere with work and your relationships.

GAD effects women twice as often men. Treating GAD through psychotherapies, either talk-therapy or cognitive behavioral therapy along with physical exercise can elevate symptoms. Simple changes in your life style can help; yoga, meditation, avoiding caffeine, daily exercise, these all are proven to have a calming effect on ones Anxiety. Herbal remedies may also work to relieve anxiety for some people, Kava, Valerian root, St John wart, but before using them speak to your doctor.

Women who experience anxiety may have other psychological issues. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder; Social Phobia, Panic attacks, Stress or Depression.

It is not healthy to let these symptoms continue indefinitely. Schedule an appointment with one of our friendly and experienced Therapists. We are here to help you.

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It’s totally normal to feel stressed or anxious from time to time, but there’s lots of things you can do to manage your anxiety.

Remember: there’s a difference between feeling stressed every now and then, and experiencing ongoing anxiety. If the stress or anxiety is starting to take a toll, consider talking to a mental health professional.

1. Talk to someone you trust about how you’re feeling
Just talking to someone about how you feel can take a weight off your shoulders. Make sure you trust the person, then work out what you want to say to them. We’ve got four more steps for talking to someone you trust here.

2. Focus on the present
Have you ever noticed that feeling stressed or anxious often coincides with dwelling on the past or worrying about the future? Simply focusing your mind on the present moment can help you feel a little more relaxed. You might be surprised to know there’s lots of ways to do this, even if you don’t like meditating. Here’s five simple ways to be more mindful.

3. Take some time out
A fully packed schedule would make a lot of people feel stressed. Make sure you fit in at least one thing you enjoy each day, whether it’s a hobby, a Netflix show, or a chat with a friend. It can also help if you schedule the enjoyable activity into your day, so that you don’t feel guilty about not doing something else.

4. Monitor your thoughts
Sometimes we don’t even know what’s making us stressed or anxious. Writing down your thoughts can help you figure out what the cause is. Once you’ve done that, you can work on challenging and changing your negative thoughts. You can use a diary to do this, or an app such as Mindshift.

5. Challenge your thoughts
If your head is full of negative thoughts, of course you’re going to feel stressed or anxious. But even though our thoughts feel true, it doesn’t mean they reflect what’s really happening. Try writing down what you’re thinking, then adding facts that support or disprove each thought. You might be surprised by how many of your thoughts are exaggerated or aren’t reality. Read more about how to challenge negative thoughts here.

6. Move more, eat well, sleep
It’s pretty well known that exercise lowers stress, reduces anxiety and improves mood. And the good news is: you don’t need to run a marathon to get the benefits. It takes just 30 minutes of exercise a day to make a difference. We’ve got some tips on how to exercise when you’re not feeling motivated.

7. Face your fears
If you always avoid situations that make you anxious, this might be stopping you from doing things you want or need to do. It sounds weird, but facing the things that make you anxious can reduce your anxiety.

It’s best to do this with the help of a professional, though, so that it doesn’t get too full-on for you. If you’d like to speak to a experienced, qualified and friendly Counselor – click here

Article by reachout.com

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For billing/insurance purposes, we must have your legal name exactly as it appears on your insurance ID Card

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Zip Code

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Focused Articles

Valentine’s Day

No matter what relationship you are in, if you don’t know how to appreciate yourself then you don’t know what would make you happy and whole. Some women feel if they don’t have a date, someone to buy them roses or chocolate that they are not worth it.

anxiety

Our therapists share their Self-care routines

Self-care is a crucial part of looking after yourself, as well as those around you.

Self-care means something different to each of us, but it doesn’t need to be complicated or overly time consuming. We asked our therapists to share their own self-care routines, maybe some of these might work for you:

what is empowerment?

what is mental fatigue and do you have it?

why am i always so tired?

The Hidden Crime

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Below are 10 common indicators of abuse:

If you can say yes to even one of these, you are in an abusive relationship.

Be prepared in case you need to call a shelter

Prepare an emergency bag, for a quick exit

Leave the situation

Build The Perfect Self-Care Day

Build the perfect Self-Care day from these activities

Generalized Anxiety disorder

What is Generalized Anxiety disorder?

managing your anxiety

It’s totally normal to feel stressed or anxious from time to time, but there’s lots of things you can do to manage your anxiety.

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